By David O Oyetunji, Phd
Today, we shall examine how old people blame every failure and misfortune on someone else. Majority never accept still their faults.
They still blame their parents and teachers for their failures as children, office bosses as children and adults and country as old persons. They blame all through their lives as they cannot see a single area they messed up.
Despite woes they encountered all through the stages of life circle, they could not see where they miscalculated and took wrong decisions or where they had ample opportunities to talk and act but chose to take no actions.
Faults will definitely come from actions taken or inactions. Shakespeare said “Our fortunes lie in our hands”. Weather you like it or not, you are responsible for your actions and inactions all through the stages of your life circle at some stages from infancy to old age.
You can go straight to today’s lesson, Old people, if you are satisfied with the preamble. You will find it below.
Let me reiterate here. A scapegoat is someone who carries your blame. No where you ever got anything wrong. You were so perfect and blameless. In all your dealings, actions and inactions, someone else caused your failures The only things you raised your shoulders high up for are the successes and achievements you made even though someone else laboured, orchestrated and acted on your behalf.
If this is your concept and philosophy in life and upon which you jubilate up and down as an achiever, I sincerely pity you for being dishonest to yourself and humanity in general.
Let us once again examine the philosophy of scapegoats at each level of human life circle: children, adulthood and old age. Since inception of humanity scapegoats have been in existence. Even children, as little as they are, throw their blames on to someone else. Everyone does it but at different levels of degrees.
Those professionals and experts in scapegoatism end up being failures in their lives. This is the reason why I want us to examine the subject matter for us to be well informed of the consequences if we indulge in it. Do you want to succeed in life or fail and blame others for it? But sincerely, you are already a failure if you expect someone else to carry your blames.
You can escape it. Just take responsibilities of your actions and inactions. See what you did wrong from time to time through honest self appraiser and you will have good testimonies to share
If God spheres our lives and grants us long live, we shall experience the three important human life circle. These are: infancy, adulthood and old age. By causation principle, there are reflective tendencies from one to another. Your adulthood can be a reflection of your infancy and old age be a reflection of your adulthood. Why then won’t you take life a serious business?
At birth, you depend on the actions or inactions of your parents, guidance and counselors. But, at some stages along the line, you choose your own directions in life. Your adulthood is most likely to be a product of who took responsibilities of your upbringing and how often you obeyed or disobeyed.
As a Child
Do you obey God and your parents while at this stage? At Schools, did you take your studies very seriously or playing guy all around? All things you were thought, which ones impacted on you and moulded your live positively towards placing you on the track of your vision and mission in life? At this stage were you able to identify your potentials and how to harness them for realizing your purposes in life?
Did you even see that period as your formative age where you foresee and plan for adulthood and old age? No! Then, who do we blame for your failures?Parents? Yes, partially if they fail to counsel you but mostly you for not following the right people and their foot steps.
We may not talk much here again. Examples are abound but you choose a convenient direction. You choose a direction of comfort and not labour. A direction flocking yourself with women and men, lying to get cheap money to fund your mundane life styles, attending parties to stray away the more from being focused as to your future, having no well thought plans for wife, children, extended family, education, basic necessity of life, etc. You look up to your employer or boss to bless you but you are not productive.
You add no value to the organization but to consume every fortune others labour for? Clear wickedness! Indulging in all stated above, who is to be blamed? Parents again? Wife or wives? Children you are to invest in for the sake of their future and comfort of your old age but neglected? Boss or bosses? Think and place your blames properly?
At Old Age
Yoruba adage says “those who refuse to work with black hair will work with grey hair”
This implies that labour is inevitable. The bible says “From your sweat you will eat? Why then do you want to eat from other people’s sweat? Those in this category are beggars. Do you want to be one?
Travails of Old Age
Old age comes with loss of strength. You can do little things at this stage. No employer wants to engage you because of fear of weak strength and senility.
Naturally, you are expected to be taking rest except for consultancy services due to accumulated experiences, if you have any. At this age, your children cluster around you and take care of you if you properly and prayerfully raised them. But if you had treated them as orphans, the law of Carma may catch you and you become second degree orphan as well because possibly you must have lost your both parents. I pray this will not be our portion.
You are to teach and show your children kindness now so as to grow with it and show you back later in life. Do you have savings or you lavish them on women and enjoyment of life? Old age is the climax of all journeys in life. How prepared have you been? Yes, there are misfortunes beyond human control but you are expected to still plan for your old age.
All through life circle, it is all plans and prayers. You cannot neglect all plans enumerated above otherwise, dooms and pains at old age awaiting you. Who to be blamed if there are neglects or negligence regarding conscious life plans? Think, reflect and place your blames properly. Now, who are your scapegoats at all your stages of life? Yourself, of course due to your actions and inactions.
If you are already succeeding taking advantages of life experiences, please continue the more. What you have can still be increased for the coming generation and those still struggling in life. Teach more people and raise more the apostles of great men and women. God gave you unmatchable and supernatural abilities both physically and mentally for the purposes of further creativities He started at the beginning of creation. You are God’s agents of creativities.
For those failing, you have bigger hope. Where there is life there is hope. Retrace your steps. Identify your set backs and move with those willing to show you the way out. You can change history. Your failures can prayerfully with hard work be changed to success. Success has no family. It goes with those who understand its principles and accordingly follow its right tracks.
My bible says ” Do not be deceived, God cannot be mocked. Whatever a man sows, so shall he reap”. This implies that God created you perfectly with sustainable endowments but you failed to utilize your potentials according to the dictates of God’s principles. Do you now blame God or who?
My bible again says, “Those who sow sparingly will reap sparingly but those who sow bountifully will reap bountifully”. Here, you should know what takes your time. If you do more of what will fail you in life you will fail the more and if you do more of what will make you succeed in life you will have more successes and accomplishments.
Adulthood is coming when you will reap what you sowed while children.
Old age is coming when you will reap what you sowed while adults.
At old age
Death is coming when you will reap all you sowed while children, adults and old persons.
Everyone is held accountable for his or her deeds and misdeeds. Actions and inactions are your prerogatives and you will be judged based on that. Maybe at the last day, when there shall be no more parents, children, organizations, individuals and countries you will face God and blame Him for your predicaments in life. Examples are abound.
Solutions are nearby. Move with the right people who are where you want to be and they will teach you how to go about your situations. You are not the only persons in your current situations. Millions of people are. Move near them and God will inspire you. Take appropriate actions or inactions and you will be there.
Stop looking for scapegoats. Take full responsibilities of your actions or inactions. Review and evaluate your actions and inactions daily. Make corrections daily to avoid accumulation of errors or mistakes and eventual failures or total collapse. Taking these rational decisions as guiding principles, successes are sure. With God all things are possible.
Interestingly, our God, the creator has been facing regrets from humanity right from the creation. You cannot be different. Any disgusting disposition you encounter from humanity, look around there are such angels created for you by God who will support and take you out of your travails. Cheer up and move on by adopting the right principles with self-appraisal from time to time.
Examine and review your actions and inactions daily and make necessary amendments towards attaining the ideals of life.
Dr. DAVID O. OYETUNJI, Ph. D., MNIM, FCNA, FCSA, FCIMA,